To my first born. You ARE a good child!

Where is the time flying to???

You know that moment when you realise your baby isn’t a baby anymore….Dudie is 7 years old. 7!!! He used to call me mommy/mama now it’s just mom. Sometimes he even uses my first name, bless this child. He is so independent but yet still so dependent on mom. Where did the last 7 years go?

One minute I was looking at a 3.4kg chubby face whom I had just birthed and the next he is in Grade 2. Somedays I miss your incessant staring at me and in the same breath I look forward to watching you grow into a handsome young man. A man who will become the object of some woman’s affection yet you will always be the object of my heart and soul.

From the moment I heard your first cry, you literally came screaming into this world, I knew you were destined for great things. Some things will be discovered later but for now, we support you in whatever you want to do. We want to give all the opportunities possible. We want you to explore, to live, to dream. To find your happiness. And wow, you have proven to be an all rounder…and we are SUPER proud of you. In any and everything you give it your best shot.

Your friends look up to you. Somedays I think you are the cool kid but you nonchalantly wave me off and just hang out with your friends. Adults comment on your excellent behaviour. I smile proudly and take the compliment whilst quietly thinking to myself “You aint seen this monkey when he loses his shit”. You are a good child and don’t you ever forget that. Somedays you just fall by the wayside…just as many of us adults do. It’s life, it happens. You know how sometimes you tell me my face has an angry stare but I insist that I am fine. Well, that is mom falling by the wayside. Or when mom doesn’t seem her talkative self, yip that is mom falling by the wayside.

In essence, I want you to know that not everyone is good at everything all the time. So when you do fall by the wayside, cut yourself some slack and don’t be so hard on yourself. At the tender age of 7 years I see how hard you are on yourself. And I know you don’t want to disappoint us. Remember what we always say: “Just try your best. You should be proud of yourself. Your best is good enough for us and should be for you too.”

You are a good child. And I am blessed to call you my son. My love for you is fierce. And it burns like a roaring fire in my soul. I am sorry that it doesn’t always seem that way though.

I love you my child. Be fearless. Discover. Go on adventures. Go live YOUR best life.

Spirited Mama

P.S. Today was a typical day where the wheels fell off the bus. I got you up and going happy bedhead and all. Somewhere in between me calmly, I promise I was calm and there was no shouting, asking you to get done for the millionth time you lost your shit with me. You went off on a tangent and then I got the dreaded “you give Troll more attention than me”. OMG! Really? I will need to rethink this situation as I really don’t think it’s true but I will merit your concerns and address them. I do think we are going through a difficult patch as you are struggling to manage your emotions. And I do think Troll definitely  makes a huge impact on the situation right now. (Adulting and parenting is hard…🙈)

Last night was opening night for your Concert. As always, the moment you take the stage my tears roll. I am so proud of you, how confident you are, how much you pour your heart and sould into everything you do. When I offered you a sandwich, you politely declined because you didn’t want to ruin the makeup 😂😂😂

When you live up to your name…

Do you know what your child’s name means? Did you choose it or did you give someone else the honour of naming your child or children? Did you choose his/her name before they were born? Or are you one of those parents who waited until your child was born, to see what “name” they looked like?

I have 2 sons. Dudie is now 7 years old and the new baby is currently 3 weeks going on 4. I can’t believe how quickly the past three weeks have flown by. Where is time rushing to?

When I was pregnant with Dudie, my Dude and I discussed several names. With both pregnancies our kids were planned. We had a few options but none that really resonated and made me feel “aaahhh that’s the name of my child”. Dude is the 4th generation of family names and when Dudie was in utero I decided that we will not continue the tradition. Don’t worry Dude was totally on board with the decision. One day on my commute to work I sought of had an epiphany. Now I am not the very religious type but I do believe in God and I do regard myself as a Christian. Somehow I had a sense of something around me and I knew in that moment that my child’s name was “Joshua”. Nowhere had I ever dreamt or intended for my child/children to have biblical names. But that feeling was so strong and reassuring that I knew he is destined to be “Joshua”.

Some might know and for those who don’t, for a very very very long time I was convinced that Joshua would be my only child. Albeit that I had relatively fuss free pregnancy and what many believe to be an easy birth too. But in 2015, Dude threw me a curveball wanting or rather longing for another baby. I wasn’t quite ready. I wasn’t convinced. And the whole baby thing was left hanging. I spent alot of time considering having another baby. Many people commented that its because I waited so long. The gap is too big. Blah blah blah… I always knew that I was not cut out to have two babies close in age… I couldn’t handle the thought of two nappy bags, bottles, diapers, etc.

Dude is very supertitious. When I told him that our first born’s name is Joshua, he told me that he needed to think about it and thoroughly do his research. He is a firm believer that one lives up to your name. It took him a while to agree that we will name our first son Joshua.

Joshua means “God saves”. Joshua was and still is my happy child. When we looked into the meaning of his name it described my child to the core. We have witnessed how Joshua has transformed our extended families. We have witnessed how Joshua has impacted our families and brought them together. This child is a hellavu kind of special person and I know he is destined to be great, no matter what he does, no matter what he chooses to be one day.

I joked about how if we ever had another child he will be Noah. Never did I imagine that it would be a reality. But in 2017, 2 weeks earlier than anticipated, we welcomed Noah into our little family. From the onset he crept into my heart and I reAlised that indeed I had a sense of longing, just as much as Dude, for Noah. Dudie is as happy as a pig in mud about having a brother. He is super proud and completely “in love” just like us with Noah.

Noah means rest and comfort. Even though he can make his voice as loud and clear as any baby, he is a peaceful child. It is yet to be seen if he lives up to his name but already he has brought comfort into our souls…

Ironically, I named both our boys, and both have Hebrew names. First and middle names but Dude did add the SURNAME😂

Little did I know that this is my destiny. My family feels complete. It’s me and my guy and our boys ❤️

This is my legacy.

This is my BEST life.

 

Spirited Mama

p.s. The sign featured is one that I bought for Dudie to hang in his bedroom.

10 Years ago…

Today, 10 years ago….we became Mr & Mrs ❤️ To be joined together as one.

The one phrase that stuck in my head since 10 years ago is “They are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man put asunder” Matthew 19.6 (Dude seems comfused. As if this is the first time he hears this verse…was he not at our wedding😂)

We have grown so much…it amazes me. We have so much to be grateful for and we are most definitely abundantly blessed. We even gained 2 beautiful sons in our marriage.

Dude is sitting next to me as I write this post this is what he just said…”Our marriage is like our tortoise…slow and steady wins the race”.

Cheers to us. To a lifetime of us. Always and forever❤️

Spirited Mama

P.S. The resident alien arrived on 24 January 2017. So in celebrating our 10 years of marriage, we also celebrate the resident alien being 10 days old today.

 

Learning to value MY own opinion

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I am learning to value and appreciate MY own opinion more and more each day. There was a time where I too was looking for my parents’ recognition BUT I am happy to report that those days are long gone. And guess what Life has been so much better since.

However, I am my worst critic…

I came across this post over at Tyranny of pink. So well said. It was and is what has been lying in my subconscious for a very very long time. Somehow, I just needed to get over myself and tell myself out old that “I AM ENOUGH”!

Spirited Mama

P.S. Tomorrow is #37weekspregnant. Dr will decide tomorrow if the resident alien should come this week or if we can wait until #38weekspregnant. I’m freaking out just a tad as it feels it’s happening too soon…

Goodbye 2016

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I loved you and hated you simultaneously. You pushed me to do things I wasn’t sure that I was capable of. BUT I did it. And I came out stronger, more centered, focused. And somewhat wiser.

2017 will see me taking some people with a pinch of salt, in small doses and limited quantities. I refuse to let others’ negativity consume me. I WILL be living MY life’s. Possibly my best life. Time to live intentionally but for ME. Cheers to 2016 but here is to welcoming 2017 with open arms.

2017
I will be completing my studies. God knows how fearful I was when I started as a fresh first year student in 2015.
Dudie will be starting Grade 2. This kid amazes us everyday. He is intelligent beyond his years, resilient and tougher than I give him credit for.

Dude wants to start studying again. We may even start brewing some life changing plans for our little family.

We will be welcoming our resident alien to our Spirited family. Less than 6 weeks to go now. #34weekspregnant

So cheers for now. Be safe wherever you may find yourselves tonight as we welcome 2017. We will be welcoming 2017 from the comfort of our home.

Enjoy the last day of 2016. Here’s to HEALTH, SUCCESS & HOPE! 

See you in 2017.

Spirited Mama

P.S. I don’t do New Years Resolutions as I think people are too pressured into making resolutions that may quite possibly not even be their own goals. I never conformed to the norms….so I like to do my own thing.

2016 the year that has been…

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(image sourced from google)

As I picked up my proverbial pen to start blogging again, I had a renewed sense of “me”. It was my calm. It was and is my outlet. It is my CANVAS.

This year has at times been trying. It’s been rough. It’s been busy. It’s been great too.

We have lost loved ones…and in turn gained new family members too. It is also the year that we found out that the Spirited family is growing.

As we prepare to create memories of the festivities for 2016, we also prepare for the imminent arrival of a New Year. A new CANVAS. A new baby. A renewed sense of “us”. 2016 is the last year that we are a family of three. We said goodbye to a stalwart in my family “MAMMA”. We have had way too many CANCER diagnoses amongst family and friends. I have gone back to working my half day JOB and frankly I think if I didn’t may have lost my sanity…

Slowly but surely I am accepting “me” for me. I am enough for me. I can only do so much. I too am only human. I found that I have sort of strayed away from God, not intentionally, but I just don’t think I purposely made a great effort to affirm my faith. I am working on restoring my faith. I am taking stock of life and counting my blessings, as we have been abundantly blessed. We have helped some family through trying times but I also think that it’s time to cut myself some slack and let it go. God will take care of it now as I cannot make them do what they need to do.

We had some great holidays and even managed a trip to Hong Kong this year. We are super proud of Dudie for completing Grade 1 this year. For all his achievements in academia and sports – this kid really did work hard.

So cheers to 2016 – the year that has been. You are etched in my soul. Looking forward to 2017! To less worrying and more time for making and creating memories…

Spirited Mama

This Christmas…

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It’s starting to look alot like CHRISTMAS in the Spirited Household. Albeit, we were 12 days late with putting up our tree…I am just happy that it is finally up. We are counting down the days to Christmas, only 11 more sleeps…For the past 7 years we have been home for Christmas. It all started when Dudie was baptised on Christmas Eve during the midnight mass, 24 December 2009. Granted he was too young to remember any of it but from that Christmas eve we have been attending midnight mass every year since. It is our very own tradition. And this year will be no different. Every alternate year we have family with us and this year was supposed to be “the family” Christmas.

Well, things changed during 2016 and even though we will share Christmas with two family members, it just won’t be the same because Mamma won’t be at our table… Mamma loved McDonalds and upon returning home from midnight mass Dude always used to buy McDonalds meals for everyone. We would open our gifts and eat McDonalds until 2am sometimes 3am. Even Dudie would be wide awake by the time we get home from mass.

We were toying with the idea of just dining out this year BUT for us Christmas is about the joy, the laughter, the togethernesss, all of us cramming into our little kitchen to cook amazing dishes to be served on Christmas day. We will spend ALL day cooking on the 24th of December, only to take an afternoon siesta so that we can be fresh and bright eyed for midnight mass. We generally only wake when the sun is high up in the sky and the room gets too hot to sleep in. We always skip out on breakfast as we just had McDonalds at 2am. Normally, we are ready to eat our festive feast by lunch time, which could range anywhere from 12pm onwards. Even our dogs sleep late on Christmas morning.

This Christmas will be different. But this Christmas we will remember the good times and encourage new traditions and memories and remember those whom once shared that table with us.

What are your Christmas traditions?

Spirited Mama