Derailed and binge drinking

Not me…the baby…Troll is binge drinking. At first I thought it was growth spurts but it has become a daily occurrence and I guess this is just what he does. I really think I should just connect the tube from my breast pump directly from breast to Troll…

My plans are being DERAILED. Clearly I have forgotten how long it takes to get out of the house with a new baby. Just to get to PicknPay, which is literally across the road from our house, takes forever. I swear it’ll be quicker if I sent one of the dogs with a note and some cash to bring back the goods.

One Sunday I had a plan of action for the day. We would go to church, go to Checkers straight after the service because the toilet paper was on special. BabySoft hasn’t been R79.95 since forever. I wrote about our use of Toilet Paper here.

Then I wanted to stop at Woolworths because I have a gift voucher to pamper myself. And I had to change baby clothes because we had duplicates, a gift we received when I already bought the exact same outfit for Troll.

Well, this is how my plan of action actually went down:

We skipped Church because I just didn’t want to wake the sleeping baby. My 7 year old said “Mom you can just pray harder here at home.” Then my 7 year old took an eternity to get done. In between Troll kept feeding as if it was the end of the world. Me having a hissy fit because the 7 year old showers for an eternity and yet he is the first to preach that we should save water. Oh and then Dude, aka the husband, messages me that he needs to go to PicknPay after work but we should enjoy our outing. I responded that we were going nowhere slowly. At 11am I put Troll down for a nap. I hurriedly dust the bedrooms, get the eldest child dressed and ready for the day. I fold the clothes from the dryer and put the next load. I never hang the laundry. I tumble dry EVERYTHING. Even the ones that say DO NOT tumble dry. I take a quick shower. I nibble on some biltong because with a new baby you kinda forget to eat nevermind make a proper lunch. Then the 7 year old is calling for food. I waiting for Dude to get home from work, just to offer me a few minutes of respite. I look at the clock and think shit it’s only 12:35 but it feels like bedtime again.

Well that’s that. I ate some fruit and some yoghurt. I’ve learnt to stock up on food that you can snack on whilst breastfeeding or handling the baby…One-handed operations only. I never got to PicknPay, neither did I make it to Checkers or Woolworths. I sat down and realised shit I still wanted to go to Makro as well. What used to be a seamless operation now takes forever and a day, planning and coordinated movements…all just to get to the shops with two kids by my side.

I always pack two baby bags. One to take with us when we leave the house and an emergency backup if we need to rush out. My 7 year old always grabs snacks for the road, albeit just to PicknPay across the road. I kid you not. Dude will attest to that.

How do you manage with kid(s)? I only have two but some days it feels like I have twenty…

#thestruggleisreal

Spirited Mama

P.S. My 7 year old says “Mom if you don’t want to smell like the baby vomit just wash with water and soap and you can smell like you”. The honesty of this child sometimes…

 

WTStikeez….

stikees2

I can’t believe Stikeez are back to haunt me. #Pnp and #Stikeez2 you are killing me… I can’t handle it. I was impressed #Pnp when you brought out your animal sound cards because hell at least it was informative. And Dudie soon forgot about his rubbery Stikeez that I needed to account for daily and ensure that none of the dogs choked on it. Somehow the dogs just loved these damn Stikeez as much as the child.

So the other day Duide randomly request that we go to Pnp to get “stuff”. I asked what stuff as we didn’t need anything that I was aware of. Then the truth prevailed…(This child was so excited and even had a twinkle in his eye much like the one I will have if I have financial independence and “free” money) The Stikeez people were at school and gave them some of the “new’ Stikeez and he absolutely cannot live without the others…My response ‘”I am so happy for you but unfortunately I will not be going to Pnp today and I will not be bamboozled into getting those Stikeez.  We head home.

Fast forward to when Dude walks into the house and announces he needs to go to Pnp for some stuff – it was his night to cook (somehow he never cooks what is readily available at home). Dudie (always reluctant to go to the shops) is already waiting at the door to go. So we head out to Pnp and boy oh boy was Dudie ecstatic about his Stikeez. In fact he is already planning to swop a duplicate.

I am at a loss for words. Stikeez2 when will you leave already?

We did have a good dinner though – Creamy prawns cooked on the Cadac Skottel outside cos it was just so lovely to sit outside…It is SO hot in Pretoria right now. At the rate that we using the aircons Eskom will be loadshedding our house soon…Sorry Eskom I just can’t NOT have the aircons on.creamy-prawns

Spirited Mama

Preparing for baby..

Whoa!!!! this shit just got real…I can’t believe how expensive things are….

I don’t even know who is more shocked…me or my bank balance. 7 years ago I almost died at the sight of the price tags of baby essentials but walking into Baby City a few weeks ago was mind boggling. I left with….nothing. I kid you not I was so shocked that I decided that I needed to regroup and clear my head. I needed a game plan and essential shopping list.

OMG, Thank goodness I still have my babysense sling and sleepy sack that I bought for Dudie when he was born. This child of mine only used his sling until he could peep out and actually see that there is activity beyond that sling so he needs to be sitting upright and checking out his surroundings. And that was the beginning of the end. Thereafter he only ever wanted to be on the floor so I packed away our sling. Here’s hoping that we will put it to good use when the new baby arrives… Now, although this is only my opinion of the essentials one would require for a new baby, in no way am I saying that your offspring will become the next president or world renowned scientist, please remember that we all have different needs and priorities. Of course as parents we only want the best for our offspring but hell man it can break your bank account.

Essential must haves:

Jogger Pram/stroller – sorted as I still have Dudie’s.

Camp cot – sorted as I still have Dudie’s.

infant/newborn car seat – sorted still Dudie’s, but I could get a new more padded version

bath compactum – sorted still Dudie’s.

bath seat and pillow – sorted still Dudie’s.

baby monitor – you guessed it, still Dudie’s.

thermometer – Dudie’s but need to check if it is still in a good working condition.

breast pump – frantically looking for it in the house as OMG it costs a small fortune.

pacifier -Dudie used his for 8weeks and the weaned himself off of it. Will buy some…

bottles- I used Dr Browns and Nuk with Dudie… Will buy new ones as I haven’t even checked what the old one’s look like…maybe I should just leave it at that and buy new ones.

wet wipes you can never have enough wet wipes. Dudie is 6 and at any given time you can walk into our house and you’d be guaranteed to find random packets of wet wipes in the house and even cars.

nappies, nappies, nappies

telement drops

telement gripewater

lansinoh nipple cream – it saved my nipples the last time.

bio oil – I guess its just my genetics but those stretchmarks still make their appearance….but love the bio oil nonetheless.

 

Now no list would be complete without a few tons of nice to haves….

baby rocker – still need to investigate this but love the concept

activity playmat -I only found the poles of our previous one….no mat but I did find the monkey that hangs from the bars. I could just make my own and connect those pipes to each other and let the resident alien lie on a mat soft mattress…but someone might just report me to the welfare

those pretty babysense burp cloths

babywrap because I love the idea of wearing my offspring. I loved my sling, pity Dudie didn’t want to use it longer.

a baby bag which will double as Mom’s handbag for the next 12 months…We all dream of this glamorous image of a new mom but in reality it is just convenient and much much less time consuming to pop your own essentials into the baby bag.

a new car seat – even though we kind of have this sorted I would like a new one though…just died at the sight of the price tags…

a new baby monitor – we have the very basic one but wow have you seen the fancy monitors these days.

shares in Pampers because you won’t believe how much money you will spend on nappies…I kid you not. Can someone let me know how I can buy shares in Pampers….

A decorator to do the new baby room….we seriously need some inspiration/ideas for a nursery/little boy’s room.

a few breakaways for mom….just me time…a peaceful night’s sleep, uninterrupted, preferably in a high end hotel with amazing room service so that I can just stay in my pjs the whole day.

a new car- ok maybe this is taking it too far but I can dream can’t I?

a Personal trainer to get back my pre preggie body…

A chef/cook, like that little old lady from the fattis and Monis tv ad. The one they used to keep locked away in the broom closet. She would make life so much easier and we could literally just ooh and aahhh over the baby all day long. (found the ad on Youtube)

In essence, you don’t need all those fancy designer clothes as your precious baby grows out it so fast. Sometimes they outgrow clothes they never even wore…don’t get me wrong it’s lovely to dress this new sweet smelling baby but believe me they poop and puke all the same in ordinary clothes just as they will in designer brands…

Currently, I am trying to figure out should I go get that wax at Sorbet or buy the damn PregOmega….Newly waxed vjay jay vs fishy burps daily…Just kidding…I will get the PregOmega vitamins. I used it with Dudie and it definitely made a difference then and now. Just got back from my wax download

I am already actively looking for a nursery school even whilst the resident alien is still in utero. It baffles me that I need to pay a deposit to secure his spot for 2017….its days liked these that I feel I should have a money tree in the backyard. Just go pick some money as and when I need it.

Happy baby prepping…

Spirited Mama

 

 

 

My bones are UPGRADING…

As we were getting ready for the school day this morning Dudie comes limping into the kitchen and announces that he will now go and undress (note – he is fully dressed in school attire sans his jersey) as his stomach and legs and just all the bones are aching…I politely (read – I don’t have time for this shot this morning) say NO you most certainly will not. YOU will go to school. Please go and get done in your room and come sit down for breakfast. And don’t even think about moping around… Off he goes and comes back now fully kitted in school attire but being the rebel that he refuses to tie his one shoe lace.

Now I put his cereal and milk on the table for him so he literally just pours the milk into the bowl and has to eat. Dudie stands next to the table stares at the bowl and decided stuff it he is drinking his Airmune aka water medicine as we call it, and then just continues staring at this bowl. I announce aka warn that I am packing the car and we are leaving in 2 minutes, so eat if you want to. He just glares at me.

I come back and say right let’s move. Dudie now wants to pour milk into his bowl. I calmly state the obvious that he has now run out of time and that he will not have cereal this morning. (I have spoilt this child for far to long… Previously I would have sat down and just allowed him to have his cereal. But no more.) I say you can have a yoghurt or an apple on the way. Decide. He chooses the apple and off we go. Our drive to school is only about 5km’s and usually takes about 10 – 15 minutes but given that Dudie can distract himself from reality that time is not enough to eat that small apple… 2 minutes into the drive he pipes up, Mom should I eat the apple first or have my vitamin(I gave him a centrum chew tablet at home and he politely just kept it in his hand). Me – whatever just have it before we get to school.

Dudie is super proud and so are we of the fact that he can read. And I mean read proper words and sentences read. So he spells a few words so that I can help him with the pronunciation.

Me: Dudie if your bones are aching then how will you play soccer tomorrow? Remember you have a soccer match tomorrow.

Dudie: It’s fine. My bones are upgrading. It only takes like 20 hours so it’ll be done tomorrow. My legs, toes , ears and elbows are already done. So its just the other bones that need to upgrade.

I swear there is a reason why we face forward whilst driving with kids….I laugh internally and made a note to LOL later.Then Dudie changes the topic to heros and superheros. He then proceeds to tell me about how Superman dies in Batman VS Superman (note this is NOT my kind of movie and Dude and Dudie have seen it a few times) but somehow I am just not getting it. Mind you am trying to weave through the traffic and to ensure that cross over safely onto the school premises, so excuse me for not focusing 0n Batman or Superman. Dudie now clearly becomes annoyed with me and just says, It’s fine that you don’t get it. It’s complicated!

Seriously, my 6 year old telling me “it’s complicated” really??? Where did this child morph from? This is the product of a Spirited, strong willed, head strong, opinionated household….and we are adding another little person to this dynamic in Spiritville. Fun times lie ahead of us…

Happy Friday. My bones will be upgrading this weekend. Parenting can be hard at times but also SO rewarding and funny. Love this child! He reminds to laugh a little…and not be so serious all the time.

Spirited Mama

images

When My 3yr old says “Mom, you’re boring!”

I had to stop myself from responding with WTF. I know I’m a paranoid parent. I’m the one who worries that he’s get hurt. Dad is the cool fun playful one. They play and I thank the Lord that I have a son ‘cos OMG a girl child would’ve been beyond tomboy… And besides I don’t have a sister. And my mother never did any mother/daughter things with me so I really wouldn’t know what to do with a girl child… When I watch them “play” my Dude says, all whilst rolling his eyes at me and with a not so subtle tone in his voice, what does Mommy say – Just remember – someone always gets hurt…

<I just spent 10minutes explaining to our executive home assistant, aka Maria our helper, that I would really appreciate it if she could handwash 1 of Dudie’s polonecks as it is soiled, looks like he swam in the sand! She was ok with this instruction when I left for work but she’s been frantically searching for this grey sweater that I specifically left on Dudie’s Bed in plain sight. And I did mention that its on his bed. She’s called me 5 times and after I tried to explain its the fck grey poloneck on the bed, I do not swear at her -promise- I may curse under my breath but not directly at her. She calls me back to say she’s found it so she’ll wash the blue jacket. BLUE? WTF? I said it’s ok just leave it I’ll sort it out tonight. I think she picked up on my irritability and called me back again and said she’s found the grey sweater. Swell – let’s see shich item she’s washed when I get home>

Anyway, I try to do fun things with Dudie. For example on Saturday I told him let’s paint. So I drag out the paint stuff and whilst Dude was braaing (barbeque-ing) we painted or lets just say Dudie painted over my pretty blue sky and green grass.. sigh. I let him be cos that’s how he paints. So after reading Tanya’s post on Cool “kid” things that adults should do, I was wondering what other parents out there are doing with their kids. These are the things we do, I took these from Tanya’s list:

Pop the bubbles in bubble wrap – I looovvve this. We have a massive roll of bubblewrap in the office and every now and then I take some home 🙂

Jump on a bed – Dudie and I cannot resist. Especially when we go on holiday! We recently spent a small fortune on our new bed so I’m definitely not jumping on that bed.

Jump on a jumping castle – Errr, we kinda broke Dudie’s Jumpolene….Maybe that’s why they say for kids under 6 yrs only.

Have a water fight – Errr, every night at bath time. Water guns, jugs, cups whatever is available will be used to scoop water and throw at any human or animal form passing by

Jump in puddles – Dudie says I need Wellies but this Mam wants some Hunter Boots

Run through sprinklers (clothed might be more appropriate) – we did this the other day. Bad idea cos its cold in Gauteng. Winter is coming

Blow bubbles – Love this. We do it all the time. We even did it on the beach in George…

Enjoy an ice cream cone with sprinkles and sauce, or even a soda float – Late night Ice-cream treats. On Sunday we started with ice-cream and chocolate ice-cap. And we’ve had it 3 times this week too

Finger paint – We don’t do this often enough

Have a midnight feast – This is reserved for Dude and I 🙂

Camp out in the garden – We set up Dudie’s tent in the lounge so we camp in the house

Make biscuits in animal shapes – Oooh this is a hit with Dudie. My Dude’s colleagues have requested that I make those animal biscuits again. Dude always take s treats to work so his workforce knows what I’m capable of…

So what “fun” things do you do?

Spirited Mama

The case of the missing Oxtail Potjie left overs…

So you may have read about how I ended up at Wilgers ER but don’t fret I’m ‘A’ for away. No rest for the wicked….

So in between all the fine dining, drinking, partying, just living in true spirited style my Dude made us some delicious Oxtail Potjiekos. (For those who do not know what I’m referring to – You cook your food in a cast iron black pot over coals(firewood/coal fire). It is mouthwateringly tasty. I generally feel that left over Potjiekos(about a day old) tastes way better…

potjies have to be so expensive? We bought a flat based pot to make “Potbread” but is yet to try it out…>

Back to the point. So one day last week, I decided we are cleaning out the fridge, eating all edible left overs and chucking the rest. The spirited family (Dude, Dudie & I) gather in the kitchen and we take on the Fridge! We ate watermelon, cheese, desserts, yoghurts, mango, peaches and then we find the ‘Oxtail”….Ta da da dam! So Dudue decides we’re gona warm it up and go sit down at the table like civilised people who are about to share the most delicious food ever….(As most men, my Dude suffers from “I-Do-NOT-KNoW-WHAT/WHEre- ANYTHING-I’M-Looking-FOr-BUT-I-JUST-HAD-IT-A-Minute-AGO- SYNDROME!) I’m not kidding – he will stand infront of his closet stare at his shirts and continue to ask me where his white shirt is? WTF? It’s right there staring back at YOU! Or the infamous – WHere are my shoes? Really? Like you wore them so how the fck should I know where you put them.

Amidst the cleanup – he asks me “where’s the Oxtail?”  This is how it went down:

Me: How should |I know? You just had it…

Dude: But I put it down on the counter… Now it’s gone!

Me: You know how you misplace things…. Maybe you put it back in the fridge?

Dude: I’ll check. Fck, I just had it.

Then we realise Dudie is no longer there…. So we go searching. We find Dudie sitting infront of the security gate feeding the dogs… yes, the oxtail….Dude runs to rescue it but alas it’s too late. They have devoured 60% of the contents and Dudie is now screaming frantically that it’s for the dogs. We surrender the food and leave him to feed the dogs. We ate crackers with cream cheese… BLEH….

Note to self: Watch child around food. Dude will feed those dogs ANYTHING! As a baby, I was once caught him sharing his dried mago strips with the one dog. He would lick it then let her lick repeat process. True Story. I shudder to think what else they may have shared. Recently, i caught him trying to feed the cockatiels chicken and the drumstick bone…. I calmly said, baby They don’t eat themselves chicken. They will get very very sick. I’m sad to report that our one bird has passed on but we do not know the cause of death…

Spirited Mama

P.S. I’m very busy at work at the moment and hardly have time to pee nevermind lunch. I got to work an hour late this morning, due to delays with the GAUTRAIN!!! Thanks a mil!

P.P.S. My cousin had a baby girl yesterday!

He embarrassed me….

Ok so Dudie is a talker… more like talk your ear off talker….

We really do enjoy how well versed he is. And he can hold his own in a conversation. But….Those little remarks about what mom & dad do and what he doesn’t do sometimes has my cheeks slightly rosy.

Exhibit A: Checkers Wine Ad on TV

Dudie: Mommy – What’s that?

Me: Wine

Dudie: Only mommy drinks wine. I drink juice and water… And nesquick but mommy drink wine.

Me: And Daddy?

Dudie: Daddy drink cooldrink…..

<The Dude gave the Dudie and extra hug just for that statement>

Exhibit B: Beer Ad Billboard

Dudie: Only Daddy & Mommy drink beer. I drink juice and water.

Me: Yes boy Daddy drinks beer. Not Mommy!

Dudie: YOu did!!!!

 

Exhibit C: Public Declaration

(I fetched him earlier yesterday and the playground was full of kids and staff)

Dudie: Only Mommy and Daddy drink Beer! Not me. I drink juice and water.

I gave up trying to salvage the situation. This kid will say what he wants to when he wants to. When I got home we did a run through the shops. Went out for dinner. Got home and bathed and put Dudie in bed within record time.

As I plonked myself on the couch, I just don’t have the energy to study right now, Dude brought me an ice-cold Brutal Fruit and a box of Ferrero Rocher 🙂 Luckily Dudie was already asleep…… 🙂